Why does every decision still come back to me?

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You've hired managers, but "Can I just run this past you?" is still coming your way three times before lunch.

A customer needs an answer. Two people want the same day off. Something hasn't been done, and someone needs to have a conversation about it. Somehow, all three become yours.

When routine decisions keep coming back to the business owner, start by checking whether managers know what they own, which decisions they can make and what a good outcome looks like. They may also need help developing their judgement, or reassurance that you won't overturn a reasonable decision simply because you'd have done it differently.

It's easy to answer and get on with your day. I'd be tempted too. But if the same decisions keep returning, another quick answer leaves you doing the thinking again next time.

The cost of being everyone's approval step

Each question can seem small. The interruption is only a minute, the answer obvious, and explaining your reasoning would take longer than sorting it yourself.

Except you're also trying to write a proposal, review the numbers or think about where the business goes next. Every interruption pulls you away from that work. Meanwhile, your manager is waiting, their team is waiting, and the customer may be waiting too.

You can end up paying someone to manage while still carrying the decisions that make management work.

Before you decide they're the wrong person, look at the arrangement around them. A job title and a list of responsibilities don't necessarily tell someone how much room they have to act.

1. They aren't clear about what they can decide

"You're responsible for customer service" sounds clear enough. Until a complaint arrives that needs more than an apology.

Can your manager offer a refund? Rearrange delivery? Commit someone else's time? Where does their authority stop?

Consider a hypothetical operations manager asked to keep work on schedule. They can rearrange tasks, but nobody has agreed whether they can authorise extra resource or change a customer commitment. Asking you may be a sensible response to that gap.

Responsibility without enough authority creates a frustrating role. They're expected to deliver, but they need your permission to do it.

Choose one recurring decision and agree:

• What the manager can decide independently.
• What limits apply, such as budget, capacity or customer commitments.
• What information they need before deciding.
• When they should keep you informed.
• When they must involve you before acting.

"Keep me informed" and "ask me first" are different instructions. Make sure you're both using the same one.

2. They made a decision last time, and you changed it

You ask someone to take ownership. They make a call. You change it because you would have handled it differently.

Do that often enough and checking first becomes the easier option.

Sometimes you absolutely need to intervene. A decision may create an unacceptable risk, break an agreed boundary or overlook important information. Explain that clearly so the person can use the lesson next time.

But sometimes their approach is simply different from yours. They wrote the email differently. They scheduled the meeting at another time. They solved the problem in a way you wouldn't have chosen, but it still met the agreed standard.

Before stepping in, ask yourself: Is there a problem with the outcome, the risk or the process, or is this a preference?

If it's a preference, consider letting their decision stand. If it's a genuine problem, explain what they missed rather than quietly taking over.

Managers build judgement through making decisions, seeing the outcome and getting useful feedback. They need room to do that within boundaries you can both trust.

3. "Take ownership" was all the direction they got

It sounds reasonable. It also leaves quite a lot open to interpretation.

You might mean spotting problems early, making a recommendation, following up without being chased and keeping the team moving. Your manager might hear "make sure the tasks get done". Both of you leave the conversation thinking you've been clear.

Define what good looks like in the actual work.

For example, instead of "take ownership of the weekly team meeting", agree that the manager prepares the priorities, raises decisions that need making, records who owns each action and follows up before the next meeting.

Then ask them to explain the arrangement back in their own words. This gives you a chance to spot different assumptions before they turn into frustration.

Three useful questions are:

• What outcome are you responsible for?
• Which decisions can you make without coming back to me?
• When would you need to involve me?

If those answers are vague, start there.

4. They need support with the decision itself

Clear authority doesn't automatically create the skill to use it.

A newly promoted manager may know the technical work inside out and still struggle with conflicting priorities, giving feedback or judging when a people issue needs help. Being good at the job they used to do doesn't mean every part of management will feel familiar.

Ask what is making the decision difficult. Are they missing information? Do they know the options but struggle to weigh them up? Are they avoiding a conversation? Is the workload unrealistic?

Those need different responses. Missing information needs access. A skill gap needs practice and feedback. An avoided conversation may need preparation and support. Too much work needs a discussion about priorities and capacity.

"Be more confident" doesn't tell someone what to do on Tuesday morning.

What to say when they ask, "Can I just run this past you?"

For a routine decision within their role, try:

"What do you think we should do, and what do you need from me to move it forward?"

Listen to the answer. They may have a sensible recommendation and only need confirmation that the decision is theirs. Or their reasoning may reveal something you need to work through together.

If they haven't considered an important factor, ask a question that helps them examine it. For example: "What would that mean for the work we've already promised?" Then agree who makes the decision and who does the follow-up.

Avoid turning this into a guessing game where they keep suggesting answers until they find the one in your head. Share relevant information and explain your reasoning when that would help.

Where the situation needs immediate escalation under your business's procedures, deal with it promptly. Managers should understand those exceptions. Fewer routine approvals should never mean hiding serious problems.

Try this: compare your answers with your manager's

Pick a recurring decision that came back to you this week. A routine customer response, scheduling issue or action from a meeting will do. Keep your established risk and escalation procedures in place.

You and your manager should each write down your answers independently:

Question	What you're checking
What outcome are we trying to achieve?	Whether you agree on the purpose and standard
Who owns this decision?	Whether responsibility is explicit
What can the manager decide without approval?	Whether authority is clear
What information or limits matter?	Whether they have enough context to judge
What would require escalation?	Whether you agree on the exceptions
How will we review what happened?	Whether learning and follow-through are built in

Compare the answers. The gaps give you something specific to discuss. You may discover that what feels obvious to you has never actually been said.

Agree the arrangement, write it down somewhere you'll both use, and try it for a week. At the next conversation, review what happened: what they decided, what still came back to you and why.

Start with one decision. You don't need to redesign the whole business before lunch.

What if it still keeps coming back?

Once expectations, authority and support are clear, you can have a more useful conversation about follow-through.

Use a specific example: "We agreed you would make this decision within these limits, but it came back to me twice this week. What got in the way?"

There may be another obstacle. Someone in their team might be bypassing them and going straight to you. If you keep answering, you can undermine the manager's role without meaning to. Redirect routine questions to the person who owns them and support that ownership consistently.

If the manager repeatedly avoids agreed responsibilities despite appropriate support, address that directly through your usual management process. You have clearer evidence to work with than "they don't seem to take ownership".

How I help owners and managers change this

I work with owners and managing directors of SMEs who are still carrying too much of the day-to-day thinking, chasing and problem-solving.

Together, we look at what keeps landing with you, where responsibilities are unclear and what your managers need to handle more of the work themselves. Where useful, I also work directly with the managers you rely on, developing practical skills in delegation, feedback, prioritising and following things through.

The work uses situations happening in your business. We agree actions to try, then come back to what happened and what needs adjusting. I bring coaching and practical mentoring together, asking questions that help you think and sharing advice when that's more useful.

You still need oversight. You also need managers with enough clarity and support to make the decisions that belong to them.